It looks like I am such a fibber
or a “half a job,”
someone who can’t keep commitments,
perhaps someone without stamina..
I am of course referring to my promise to publish terrible poetry every day for the month of April, to complete the Napowrimo challenge.
I didn’t fib. Initially, I wanted to take on the challenge, so at the time of publishing that goal, it was true.
It’s also true that I did not do “half a job” but actually did less. I only published two poems. I didn’t keep the commitment, but this doesn’t represent my stamina or character. After consideration, I changed my mind and made a new decision; a new commitment; one that superseded my first intention.
I decided to take April off.
I decided to politely turn down requests for appearances at events, for contributions to written collections, for attendance at groups, meetings, gatherings etc.
I honoured any promises I had previously made for example running the Stockport Writers Session and attending Write Out Loud Poetry night, but I didn’t agree to take on anything new.
I also stopped booking or actively seeking workshops. I gave myself permission to stop, for a whole month.
I actually picked up a book to read for pleasure, not to study technique or research writing styles, but to read for the pure joy in reading.
I feel balanced again. I feel better. I feel my equilibrium has benefitted. I feel my priorities are restored.
I recommend it. Take May off! Give yourself the gift of saying “no, thank-you” for 31 days and see how healing it is.
I may publish dodgy poetry in future, but for now, and the remaining 6 days of April I won’t.